Wednesday, May 27, 2009

I am down

I'm down.
I know what the problem is too. I just keep holding on to things that aren't good for me. Like ice cream. Not really ice cream. I have moved away from the ice cream. There was nothing to lick there.
It is intangible things that are weighing me down. Mostly things I can do nothing about.

Hanna and I are forging our relationship and that is exhausting. It is very good, but heavy sometimes.
I have a relationship that is in disarray. I have done what I could and should, but it wasn't enough and so it is crumbling.
Special people in my life are moving away swiftly and abruptly. It makes me sad.
I am estranged from someone I care about, but there is no remedy, and so it is.
I agonize about how my actions and reactions effect others, even when what I am doing is right. I still hate that it causes problems that aren't my fault.
I could go on, but I imagine you all know the list. You have a similar one of your own.

Today it's just getting to me and I thought I'd write about it. Then I need to change what I am dwelling on. The surest cure is:

Philippians 4:8
Finally brethren, whatever it true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.


sue said...

I love you my friend! Look up towards Him!

Thanks for the evening we shared, I enjoyed it.

Christcrew said...

Traci -
I know the those feelings. You will be in my prayers. How about a park day or something? A day of fellowship, fun and prayer works wonders!

amy sedor said...

Bummer. You deserve much happiness. Hope it finds you today. your very old pal,

traci said...

Hi Guys,
not so down today. Just a heavy moment. I can't do everything myself and needed a little support.

ShannonC said...

Thank you for posting that verse. I needed to dwell on that one.